Cabo Getaway

Yesterday, Jake and I flew to Cabo to meet up with his parents and siblings for an adult getaway. I was quite reluctant about leaving our kids and even had mentioned needing to get a head injury as to not have to leave them.  My sisters stepped up and offered to take care of the kids while we came and mom would help too.  This elevated much stress but I still do not like to burden others with things. Wednesday, the day before we were to fly out, I decided to go to the doctor because my throat had been a little scratchy and was diagnosed with strep. Argh!  They sent me home from work early as well. I ran by the grocery store to get a few last minute things for the kids and decided to make Chris an appointment too to be safe.  I like to think it was mother's intuition because he did not ever say he felt bad, nor complained but he too has strep.  This made it more difficult to leave them but here we are in Cabo and it is beautiful! My worries about my children are very minute because all three of my sisters are going out of their way to help and mom is staying with them Sunday night.  Dad drove up to attend Will's pinewood derby with him.  He placed 3rd and got most creative car. He was pretty excited when I spoke with him on the phone this evening.  As for me, I am feeling better. Last night, I tried my hardest to ward off not feeling great..I even went a little nuts and went to dance when volunteers were asked for....remember I have absolutely no rhythm and I had allowed myself to a have a rough afternoon.  My feelings were a little hurt by Jake yesterday but I can not blame him. I think the medicine plays with me sometimes and I was very tired from not sleeping much in preparation for the trip. He had asked if I wanted to "walk down to the beach, go to the pool, or something" with he and his brothers and I declined saying I was busy (I was trying to chat on-line with the cell phone company to ensure we could use our phones here is Mexico). He said that I could not not work and did not know how to not work.  I decided that maybe I should change and go but not get in the water because I think it is a bit chilly.  A few minutes later when I walked out, everyone was gone.  I was bothered that he did not tell me he was leaving nor did he has his phone for me to find out where they went.  And I had just mentioned to him on the plane that I did not always enjoy being around family because there are times when I feel like my ideas/feelings are less and he chooses them.  I know it is insanely ridiculous to be bothered about and I am sure I read into it and let it get to me.  I do not doubt he loves me but sometimes I look at others and want to be wanted that way, smiled at endlessly as I approach, or want to experience the beauty of a place first, even if that means waiting a minute. I want to be taken by the hand and just spent time with.  It is such a beautiful place here and we have the opportunity to be here and enjoy it.  I realized this afternoon that I was wrong for allowing myself to get that worked up and apologized again.  I am fortunate to have him as my eternal companion and husband.  It is imperative to me that my kids see a happy marriage and are all close to one another. I want the boys and girls to love each other, look to our marriage as an optimal example of love, and always feel equally cherished by their parents.