Community Service Hero Award

Today, I received the following in a letter but did not realize today was February 20th until after the employment fair about 7:00pm. (One of us was asked to attend that to represent the school so Jake went so I could eat dinner with my mom)
“Dear V Renee Farrell,
       Let me be the first to congratulate you on being a recipient of a Community Service Hero Award for 2018. You are receiving by this award for your tireless device to your community and your efforts to make tomorrow better for those living in the Mid-South
       We are holding a Gala in your honor called the Community Service Heroes Gala to be held Tuesday evening, February 20, 2018 at the Bartlett Performing Arts and Conference Center (3663 Appling Rd, Bartlett TN 38133).  The reception will begin at 6:30 p.m. with the ceremony following at 7:00 pm. Please attend to receive your award....”

And I missed it. School was out Friday 2/16 for a PD day and on Monday 2/19 for Presidents Day, so today was the day I received this and didn’t realize until tonight when I went to put it on the calendar that today was the 20th. I am sad that I missed it and would have like to attended with Jake.

For no particular reason I feel like today has been hard and I can't get caught up on things. I feel like I have been rushed all day. Jake went to the neurologist after school again for his headaches and was told there's pretty much no more medicine he can try for them and that includes the Botox we've already had done. Jake is convinced the only way to cure his headaches is two hours of exercise a  day. No doubt excercise helps but he thinks I'm unsupportive because I think two hours is excessive each night. Why not get up early and do it, so we gave a little family time in the evening. As it is now, we only have two to three hours each night before bed for the kids. Then I feel guilty for even speaking out but I'm exhausted daily too and maybe, just maybe if he got up early some too he'd go to bed earlier and we'd both get more sleep (I take Ginny to seminary so am up at 4:45in the morning.  Yet, then again I hate that he suffers with headaches and say I'd do anything to help them but will I really if he says I'm not supportive? Is it really asking too much for him to not do seven days or to do some mornings instead of nights? I barely feel afloat some nights especially with ball season and what not. What would it feel like to be  able to come home and know everything would get done and I would not have to be the one to it (clothes washed and folded, dinner prepared, homework done, dishes done, etc)? I guess I, just ranting and trying to find way to not feel selfish for not wanting to have him gone each night and not feel like I'm a single mom.  I fear it will not bring us closer. I see myself shutting off with quiet frustration that he gets all this "me time" and I'm exhasted from running around with my head cut off trying to take care of four kids, a house,  and two jobs. I need to see the good and hopefully his headaches will be cured.