Finding my Purpose

We are now two weeks into our quarantine and although I feel like I have accomplished a lot of small things, I do not feel that I have accomplished many things.  We have planted a small garden, worked on the patio, played games, played outside, tried new recipes, and I have shown a few houses (not that I want to but I need to try to make a little money (we tend top spend more when not at work) but each time I go out, I fear bringing something back to a member of my family).  Today as we had "home church", which was soothing to my soul and I love doing, my mind pondered what my purpose is during this pandemic. Is there something I am suppose to be learn or teach my family or reach out to others about. What can I teach my children through all this,  what will my babies remember through this quarantine? Christopher seems to have questions about covid and what is happening in the world- how do I comfort him and help him turn to good. My mind has also turned to my students as well and I wonder if they are okay, what learning opportunities can I provide them to bring normalcy but not stress. I want to be a force for good, a helper, and someone who helps lift the burdens of others.

Birthday Reflection

I think it is safe to say that Ginny had a great little birthday.  She had over a dozen cards in the mail today and I know that many more are going to continue to come in this week.  She woke up to a delivery of flowers and had more throughout the day delivered today. My parents and Charity came up from Jackson and sang to her through the window. Stella, her best friend, and family stopped by and decorated the door and sang.  She also had many other visitors stop by throughout the day to drop off treats and to sing: Callie Martineu (dinosaur cookies and card), Sherri Nelson (new book and card), Kate Lyman (earrings, card, and randoms), Noah Orris (card and candy), Carly Garrett (burned cd's with songs that remind her of Ginny), Debbie Donald (flowers and candy), Candice Marshall (bread and girl scout cookies), Jason and Ellen Payne (cookies), Rebekah (Chick Fil fries and shake). She had several phone calls from folks too, even from people we rarely hear from. Ginny requested spaghetti and Alfredo for dinner with Italian cream sodas and my attempt at homemade breadsticks.  I hope that she felt loved and in the end knows that I made it as special as I could for her.  I told her it may be have been better to be "quarantined" because of all of the attention.  She was smiles most of the day and my heart was happy.

Happy Birthday Ginny!!

We are doing all we can to "flatten the curve", so we are not around people but I really wanted to make this birthday special the best I could, so last week, I reached out to people and asked them to mail cards or letters....I wanted to "flood the mailbox". It is not the same as having an 18th birthday celebration but I am hoping it allows her to feel loved and valued.

Happy 18th Birthday to our Ginny....Today was a day I had hoped to have a big celebration for one of the biggest presents of my life! Ginny is the type of girl that brightens a room, seeks out the one who may need a friend at the time, has a giving heart, sacrifices for others, is an extraordinary example for her young her siblings, thinks she is hilarious (sometimes she actually is because she is cracking herself up so much), and exemplifies not judging others in a negative way. We are blessed she is ours and our oldest. There are a ton of good things I would like to wish for Ginny, but it all boils down to a few things... My hope and wishes are many but these are the biggest- that your relationship with our Savior continues to grow and that you always know you are remembered and remember your worth. I wish that every year, this very day, when you look back to the past years, there won’t be any regrets for the things you did and – most importantly – for the things you didn’t do. We love you GinBug! 

Facts about Ginny, by Ginny:

You currently want to be when you grow up: dental hygienist

Your favorite color is: pink and grey

Your favorite show is: The Office

Your favorite game is: Spades

Your favorite toy or activity is: squishmallows 

Your favorite boy is: um.... Jesus

You are really good at: making people laugh  

Your best friend is:  Estella Seaman

You want to vacation to: Greece

Your favorite ice cream is: cookies n creme

Your wish is to be: happy and successful

Your hero is: my mom

Your favorite thing to do with your friends is: hang out. Like sit around and watch movies.

Your favorite holiday is: Halloween

Your favorite person in the whole world is: myself

Your favorite song(s) is: There is a light that never goes out- The Smiths

Your favorite restaurant is: Chick-fil-a

Your favorite foods are: pasta and Italian

If you had $1000 you would buy: I would finish paying off my car man 
 

Jake's Journal Entry for the Day

Jake and a few members of his family shared some of their thoughts on the current situation via a text string and I asked Jake to send me his to put on here (I consider this my family journal).  I will include that and my daily photo update.  Jake and Ginny usually attend a movie together the weekend before or or the weekend after their birthdays but since all theaters are closed right mow and we are trying to physically distance ourselves, I arranged for them to have the media room to themselves for a show.  What I loved the most is both dressed nice for it...how sweet is that! We spent hours outside today and that was also great.

Jake's text to his family today (3/23/2020): "I thought my days were tough.  I wake up around nine and workout (at least today anyway).  After I workout I am worried I have Covid due to the heavy breathing, but my family reminds me that maybe I am just out of shape.  Then, I am forced to watch movies, read books, play games, and eat.  The sacrifice of social distancing!

More seriously, today started in family isolation.  We are doing our best to practice physical distancing.  The city of Bartlett is putting bears in the windows so people out on walks can do bear hunts.  So we decided to go out for a walk.  As soon as we step out, five of our neighbors come out to talk as well.  We kept our distance but socialized for about 3 hours.  I was good after about 15 minutes, but Renee is a talker.  We celebrated my birthday with homemade Tres Leches cake and carry out Mexican food.  I am not big into social gatherings and prefer to be around just my family, so that was awesome.  Several students emailed me happy birthday and one even dropped by with a gift (that Renee sprayed with Lysol).  Ginny and I have a tradition of going to a movie for our birthdays.  So today Ginny and I watched Jurassic Park in the media room and everyone else stayed downstairs and decorated for Ginny's birthday tomorrow.

Renee and I are making videos of fun experiments they can do at home.  I am almost certain school will be online starting April through the end of the year.  I want to send all these funny memes to parents about homeschooling, but I just can get myself to rub in the difficulties they must be experiencing with that.  I will send some your way... they are just too good not to share with someone.

Ultimately, I feel blessed to have a prophet that has prepared us for hardships.  I am grateful to have a beautiful home to stay in and a family to spend time with.  I am grateful for technology that keeps me in touch with loved ones.  Everyday is a reminder of the love God has for me."

I am a little selfish here but I am loving our time as a family and being forced to spend this time together.  Yesterday, missionaries from across the world in foreign nations were sent home. As we were taking about it the photos people were posting and mixed emotions parents and those serving were feeling, Ginny reminded us that it is a "sign of the times" that missionaries will be sent home.  I felt a lump in my throat and thought for a moment, is this really the time that I have been chosen to live in? Have a properly prepared my children? myself? Then I thought of all the good too and I know that God is there and the more I read my scriptures, the more real that becomes. We are never forgotten, we are His children.

Note, my homemade cake, dinosaur mac n cheese, and homemade bunny rolls.

Yes, I had to go get milk but I bought the boys bikes too and Christopher learned to ride.

I am just glad they like each other here.

Happy Birthday Jake

Speaking of that man, today is his birthday! He has loved me unconditionally. It has taken me many years to appreciate being loved the way he loves me. Unfortunately, I had the miss conception that the way "love" is shown was a depiction of what you see in the media (flowers, chocolate, surprise getaways, candle lit dinners, etc) but guess what, it is not. When looking for that type of love, you or I missed the way Jake shows his love.  He is not one to buy flowers (but that may be my fault) but when I have been gone longer than anticipated, he calls to check on me.  While he does not do candle lit dinners with soft music playing in the background, he has learned the master of grilling steak, accompanied by hot plates, he has learned to make home-made fried rice, and he often delegates the cleaning of the kitchen so I do not have to do it. While we do not have many getaways, that is another way he shows his love because he knows I do not like to leave me kids and it causes me great anxiety, so our little getaways are watching a show upstairs when the kids are asleep or running for Mexican after a rough day or just because. So while, my birthday guy may not show love depicted in the movies (those are all temporary moments), he does much more and shows small, consistent acts of love. He does the morning routine at work (checks our boxes, etc), learns to master meals I love, brings me popcorn when there is fresh popcorn, clears his things off the table when he senses it is driving me too crazy, allows me to live near family, watches sappy shoes I like, outstretches his arm during shows motioning for me to lean in, keeps the exterior of our home nice, plants roses and tomatoes for me, helps me understand science stuff, and holds me when I need to be held.  He is my all! Some things that Jake enjoys are: board games with the family, Mexican food, a manicured lawn, pizza, cold cereal, grilling, traveling, movies, piano playing, and books.  He is the glue that holds our family together and leads by example.  Happy birthday Love!

Home church

     Home church was beautiful yesterday (3/22/2020). We began with Ginny playing "Come Follow Me" and Aubree led, even just during the song, I felt my eyes wet a little bit and humbled.  Jake blessed the sacrament and Will passed it to everyone. Christopher had prepared a talk to share and then we watched a conference talk, spent time studying Jacob 7, and sang "A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief" (Jake played and Aubree led).  It was a tender moment for me to to not only watch my husband and son administer the sacrament but to see/ hear Jake lead the family in scripture study and bear his testimony.  He is my strength many days!

Social Distancing

Our little family is doing the best we can to stay in and have done well thus far.  We spend the days doing puzzles (still working on the same one for three days now, it is a 2000 piece one), playing games, watching one show an evening, trying new recipes, and on non-rainy moments during the day- going outside.  Yesterday, we spent about three hours in the car with Aubree trying to help her learn to drive a stick shift.  She was in tears by the end of it but seems to have a much better handle on it now.  For the first time yesterday, I felt overly anxious about the unknowns with my children.  Is this the beginning of what the remainder of our days may be like? I also felt great stress about how to make Ginny's birthday special for her next week...it is a big one, 18! Since we are "social distancing", no friends will be allowed over.  I texted a couple dozen people asking them to send cards, I am hoping to "flood the mailbox" with happies for her to help her feel loved.  I hope that the nation and my family uses this as a time to come together. We need one another! Schools across the states are pro-longing returning to actual schools but are attempting virtual learning, we have not received any updates as far as Bartlett besides we are out until 3/30.  Jake and I have reached out and offered to drop off food to those whom may need it and are trying to be good neighbors and citizens while heeding the plea to minimize contact with others beyond immediate family.  Social gatherings of 10+ have been cancelled and restaurants are encouraged to do take out only to help limit interactions.  Through the limitations, I see good happening too, like stores allowing "senior hours" only for the senior citizens and the realization that much can be accomplished with the same vision.

Coronavirus (Covid-19)

     The world has been in a state crazy as nations have been fighting the corona-virus. Parts of China and the nation of Italy have basically shut down, and have begged the United States to heed their counsel, not waiting to believe the extremities before it is knocking on the door. As the virus has now made it's way into the United States and multiples rapidly day by day, measures have been put in place.  We, as a nation, are a haughty and prideful people and have not taken it serious thus far.  It seems this week, a new perspective has been given.  Before Thursday of this week, I had not been anxious nor apprehensive because I feel like I have strived to heed counsel of church leaders and to have short tern supplies on hand. I had mentioned to Jake that I could not decide if people were beginning to over react (store shelves are literally empty as of Wednesday of this week) or not taking it serious enough by not closing schools and trying to prevent a rapid spread. Are we as a nation heeding what other devastated countries have shared or are we too prideful? However, Thursday afternoon the First Presidency, announced that all church meetings, including sacrament, were closed until further notice.  It was then that I almost immediately felt uneasy. If the prophet a God, whom was a doctor by profession, has been inspired to suspend sacrament and proxy work in the temples, then this must be crucial for our nation. I suddenly felt that maybe I am not prepared to teach my children the gospel alone and President Nelson has been trying to prepare us with an increased emphasis on gospel centered home study. While Jake and I will counsel with out children and devise a plan, we will continue to observe the Sabbath and try to improve our family spiritual readiness.
     Schools across the nation have been closing down until the end of March (we did have Spring Break scheduled for one week anyway) and others through April to hopefully slow the spread of the virus. Bartlett announced yesterday that we will close through March. Little is known about this strand of the virus and there is not a treatment plan yet, so the idea to close schools, encourage social distancing, and try to stop a peak is to not overwhelm the medical field to where people are turned away. As of now, the elderly or those with weakened immune systems are most susceptible, the incubation period is long and people can be spreading it without even knowing. What can I do to help? I worry that the elderly may not have supplies needed and while I strive to protect my children and make sure we have toilet paper and medicines, who is doing the same for the widow? I messaged the branch president to ask if he is aware of any needs in the branch that we can help with today but have not heard back. It may be a matter of time before parts of our nation are "locked down" or quarantined. 
      I think it is also completely normal and okay for me to feel anxious or apprehensive. The unknown can be scary at times and just because I have those feelings on certain aspects of it (like teaching my children the gospel alone (let's be real, those sacrament talks were nice) or if we can not leave our home for weeks, making sure we have all we need), that does not mean I do not have faith nor that do not trust God is in control (this may help to humble our nation and bring us closer to him).