Feelings of insecurities

Today was the first day for teachers to go back for school. It was not as pleasant as I would've hoped and I felt very insecure. This year I will be teaching 8th grade science and social studies. You would think I'd be completely confident being married to Jake with science because he's the expert and everyone in the district loves him.  Multiple times when I was introduced, it was my name and he was my hubby. The challenge ahead of me is to aspire to be as good as he is in science. He is very well respected. I became a little annoyed today that he freely gave everyone all his work and information. (I was hoping that would be an advantage I had) He said it was obvious that I became annoyed and he's certain everyone knew it and his colleagues may think we have a bad relationship. Yet, that's not true...we have a great relationship in my book and anyone whoever hears me speak of him would know that. I was hoping that together we would be a duo an collaborate but right now at this moment, I feel that I am a hinderence to him. So, I guess here's to praying for improvement on my part and a better tomorrow than I've had this far. I am home thirty minutes before I'm off to PTA and to a little real estate after that. 

Texas trip

We made a quick trip to Texas to visit family over the 4th. I feel beyond blessed to live in this great nation.  I LOVE America.  Sometimes trips to Texas are a little over whelming for me but I love seeing my husband enjoy his family.

 

Virtuous women

There is never any doubt in my mind that my husband loves me. He makes me happy and often I feel better than I am around him, even like a princess. However, there are moments or rare actions that make me feel, although he loves me, that he may not always want me. I am confident there is no other person that he'd prefer to spend time with but I want him to "desire" me all the time. The world can have a way of making us feel less or not as pretty if we do not meet what society deems as beautiful. There are days when I feel not cute because I do not fit the mold. However, I am trying to fit the mold that my Heavenly Father finds beautiful. I strive to be virtuous, patient, and find the good in situations. I want to make lives better by being in them. I want to have a gentle heart and show my children through example that even women whom the world may glance at and call average to the Lord, those very women may be the most beautiful at that time. 

Fathers Day 2015

21 years ago, Father's Day fell on Sunday, June 19.  It is a day that forever will be engraved in my mind because it is the day my Mamaw (grandmother) passed away. I think about every Father's Day Sunday and still remember the songs sang that day at church. This Sunday was no different as I sat in sacrament but as I glanced at Jake and my boys, I felt a sense of peace and gratitude. After church, we went to my parents for dinner and to see Papaw. It was a nice visit. I miss my girls more and more each day now. They went back to Michigan last week with Michael's family. I'm certain they are having a great time but I plan to get back this week. 

Dear Ginny....

Dear Ginny, I wanted to write this letter for you on your birthday. You have grown up so fast. I guess being the oldest kinda does that. I remember wanting to see you when you got to the next milestone; to see you walk, to hear you talk, to hold your hand going to school. Now you are 13. The next steps are your first dance, first date, drivers license, and graduation. We only have five years left. When I use to wish for the days to pass quickly till the next break, now I pray for them to slow down. But time keeps marching on. So here are my hopes for the next five years...to see you smile every day, see you find God and become His friend, to cherish the everyday moments as a family, to hear you giggle with your sister and friends, and for you to know that I love you forever. I hope I can make these the best five years of your life yet. I love you. Love, Dad This was a note left to Ginny after the night Ginny was a girls camp. Jake is such a great dad and talented writer. I am lucky he is mine and that Ginny is ours. We have been blessed with great children. He is right, I, too, want time to slow down and to cherish these moments with our littles.

Back together after camps

I am happy to say that my little family is back in tact after camps (girls camp for Jake and Ginny and scout camp for Jake) this week. Yesterday, we had a party for the boys. We celebrated Chris's 5th birthday and Will's 1/2 birthday (first time ever I've done that). I didn't want anyone to bring two gifts so families received an invite for one or the other. We reserved the pool and invited families to stay to swim too. The boys chose a pirate theme with grilled hot dogs. I believe it was a fun night for all. Jake had been writing the middle school science curriculum for Bartlett City Schools, so tonight the kids and I made paper airplanes and played games. It was nice to be able to lay on the floor and enjoy them. 

Busy week

It's a busy week for our family. Ginny is at girls and Jake is priesthood there for a couple days and then he heads to scout camp. Meanwhile, Will got his first hit this season in baseball. He was so proud and I was so proud for him. Amy is down with the kids to visit for 10 days and the kids are so excited to see cousins. We are enjoying the pool.